Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Serious Questions from a Hazy Mind

Still fuzzed up with pain killers (and other assorted happy drugs) and trying to type and mouse with my left hand so in lieu of a regular post I offer these...

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard when he lives in the jungle without a razor?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

What is the speed of darkness?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Stop singing and read on......

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

(Does the fact that I laughed at the last one mean I'm taking too many drugs?)

That's it.  I'm done.


Maria Zannini said...

I'm not on drugs and that last one got to me too. :)

I know it feels like forever when you have a spastic muscle. Hope it relaxes soon.

Dru said...

LOL! Love them all.

I hope you feel better soon.

MengleOh67 said...

Hysterical and thought provoking LOL ... I hope you feel better soon we missed you at Wednesday night's meeting!

Linda Leszczuk said...

Maria and Dru - Thanks for commenting and for the good wishes.

Linda Leszczuk said...

Stacy - missed yours (fuzzy headed). Thanks. Sorry I had to miss the meeting. See you there next month.

Cathy in AK said...

That last one might have been tempered by some serious drugs, so what's *my* excuse? :)

One more for you: Why do you park in a driveway and drive on a parkway?