Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Remembering Mom with Laughter

Happy Hump Day

I was having a little trouble coming up with the usual hump day funnies this morning. You see, it was seven years ago today that the greatest mom in the world left us, and left a hole in my life than will never be filled.

But then I thought about how much Mom loved to laugh. So I decided to share a couple of her favorites with you.


When my boys were going through the jokes and riddles stage, they loved visiting their grandmother. She always laughed and not just to be polite, she really enjoyed their little funnies.  These were a couple of her favorites.

Man in restaurant: "Waiter, what is that fly doing in my soup?"
Waiter: "The backstroke, I think, sir."

Riddle:
Why did the elephant sit on the marshmallow?
He didn't want to fall into the hot chocolate.





This last joke is a little long but I still remember the first time I told it to her. She laughed so hard, she cried.


A man from New England goes to Texas for a business meeting. It’s his first time in the Lone Star State.  He steps off the plane and is blown away be the size of the airport terminal.

“Wow,” he murmurs, “it’s so big.”

A passerby answers, “Everything’s big in Texas, sonny.”

The man catches a cab to his hotel and, again, he’s awed by the size of the lobby.

“My Lord, this lobby is huge.”

The desk clerk answers, “Everything’s big in Texas.”

The scene repeats when he reaches his room and this time it’s the porter who tells him, “Everything is big in Texas, sir.”

The man puts his things away and decides to have a drink in the bar before dinner. The hotel bar is, of course, huge.  The man orders a martini but it’s served in a glass he could almost bathe in. “That’s can’t be a martini. It’s too big.”

And the bartender replies, “Everything’s big in Texas.”

Well, not to appear chickenhearted, the man drinks the over-sized drink and immediately feels the effects. He asked the bartender for directions to the men’s room.

“Down that hall, last door on the left.”

The man staggers down the hall but he’s pretty fuzzy at this point and goes through the last door on the right…which leads to the outside courtyard.  He closes his eyes against the bright light, takes a few steps and falls into the hotel swimming pool.

And comes up yelling…

“Don’t flush it! Don’t flush it.!”


I can hear her laughing, even now.

I'm also doing something a little different for your "aw" picture this week. This may not be an aw for you but it is for me. This picture was taken about a month before Mom died. My brother was in town for a visit. Mom's Alzheimer's was pretty advanced by then and she didn't participate much in conversations but she definitely knew whose finger she was holding on to and that was enough to make her happy.  Look at her smile.






 If you're fortunate enough to still have your mom, give her a call today and tell her you love her.

Happy Hump Day.

Quotes for the Day:

A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. -Tenneva Jordan

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it. -Mark Twain

The death of a mother is the first sorrow wept without her. - Unknown

A mom's hug lasts long after she lets go. - Unknown

Monday, February 25, 2013

With Apologies to Anne Hathaway

Well, this looks bad. My first day back and I'm already late getting my post up. I have a post half-finished,  all about the great week I had with my good friend Maria Zannini, but I got side tracked last night.

I blame the Academy.  (You know, ...of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences)

No, seriously. I sat down to watch the Oscars for just a few minutes because the only one I really wanted to see was Best Actress in a Supporting Role.  They always do the supporting actor and actress awards at the beginning so I figured I'd be back at the computer in no time.  But they didn't. They gave the supporting actor but not the actress. And I kept watching, and waiting.

You see, I felt I owed it to Anne Hathaway because of a false assumption I'd made about her. When I first heard they were making a screen version of one of my all time favorite Broadway musicals, Les Miserables, I cringed. Would Hollywood ruin it, like they have so many others?  Would they take a song that was at the heart of the story and totally change its meaning, i.e. "What I Did For Love" in Chorus Line?  Would they give a major part to a screen actor who can't sing, i.e. the Phantom in Phantom of the Opera? (At least they dubbed the singing for Audrey Hepburn in My Fair Lady. And we won't even mention Pierce Brosnan's painful performance in Mamma Mia.) Would they use all box office "names", instead of casting actors more fitting to the roles?

When I heard about Anne Hathaway being cast as Fantine, my heart fell.  What were they thinking?  That role needs serious acting chops and a great singing voice. They gave it to bubbly Princess Mia?

 
Then I saw the movie. Anne Hathaway blew me away. Completely. I walked out of the theater saying if she didn't get an Oscar for that performance, there was no justice.  So I felt it was only right that I watch it happen.  And, of course, it did. My apologies and congratulations to Miss Hathaway.

Now take a couple minutes and enjoy this.



See what I mean?

So...how about you?  Are you a Broadway musical fan?  Any screen adaptations you especially liked or hated? What was your favorite "surprise" performance?

I still have lots to share about my week away so check back on Wednesday to meet some of my new best friends.

Quote of the Day:

"Never assume the obvious is true." ~ William Safire

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Happy Hump Day and I'm Outtta Here

Happy Hump Day

Got a mostly picture Hump Day post for you today.

Don't you wish this first one was a video instead of a still shot?


Yup, he's in trouble.



Little something from the Irony department here.


You noticed the sign, right?



This one just made me laugh.


Be careful who you call ugly.



Need a little inspiration to get you through the week?


Go for it, kitty. 



This next one could qualify as today's "aw"...


 but I think I'll caption it, "No, it's not quite ripe yet."  (lol)



Okay, here's today's "aw".


It seemed perfect for Valentine's Day.


That's it. Hope those funnies were enough to get you over the mid-week hump. Did you have a favorite?

I'm leaving tomorrow for a writing conference and mini-retreat so I'll be off line until the 25th. Try to stay out of trouble while I'm gone.

Hopefully I'll have some good stuff to share when I get back.  See you then.

Question of the Day: 

If all is not lost, where is it?

Monday, February 11, 2013

New Release - Polar Night.


Happy Monday.  

Hope everyone had a great weekend.  

Mine was a mixed bag. I got to spend Saturday with a good friend I hadn't seem in years but on Sunday we were all under the weather - hence the late post this morning.

I want to give a big shout out to author Julie Flanders on the release of her debut novel, Polar Night.



Polar Night, a suspense novel with a supernatural twist, is now available from Ink Smith Publishing and Amazon

When Detective Danny Fitzpatrick leaves his hometown of Chicago and moves to Fairbanks, Alaska he wants nothing more than to escape the violence and heartbreak that left his life in pieces. Numbed by alcohol and the frozen temperatures of an Alaskan winter, Danny is content with a dead-end job investigating Fairbanks' cold cases. That all changes when a pretty blond woman goes missing on the winter solstice, and Danny stumbles upon some surprising connections between her disappearance and that of another Fairbanks woman three years earlier. Forced out of his lethargy, Danny sets out to both find the missing woman and solve his own cold case.

The investigation points Danny towards Aleksei Nechayev, the handsome and charming proprietor of an old asylum turned haunted tourist attraction in the Arctic town of Coldfoot. As he tries to find a link between Nechayev and his case, Danny's instinct tells him that Nechayev is much more than what he seems.

Danny has no idea that Nechayev is hiding a secret that is much more horrifying than anything he could ever have imagined. As his obsession with finding the missing women grows, Danny finds his own life in danger. And when the truth is finally revealed, the world as he knows it will never be the same.


Gotcha hooked? Yup, me too.

Best of luck on your release, Julie.

I've got to cut this post short because that "all", as in "we were all under the weather" yesterday, includes my granddaughter who had to stay home from school today; so I'm on Nana duty.  I'll probably be late getting around to visit everyone this morning, but I'll get there.

See you on Wednesday.

Groaner of the Day:

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.

Friday, February 8, 2013

It's Enough for Now

Hi.  TGIF.

I'm wearing a happy face, too
I'm feeling pretty good this morning.

Well, not my stupid knee. The doctor gave me a cortisone shot yesterday and the initial reaction included swelling and stiffness. But I'll give it some time.

No, I'm feeling good about my writing and about some tiny signs of progress.

I attended our Western Ohio Writers Association meeting last night. I took a story I'm thinking of submitting to a major anthology to our critique group and received a thumbs up/it's ready from everyone. And this is not a warm fuzzy, pat on the back type of critique group.

I also had a chance to talk with some authors whose stories were not selected for an upcoming anthology that will include one of mine. I know this sounds selfish and not at all supportive but these are writers whose work I like and respect so it gave my ego a nice boost.

The national writing contest I entered a story in just before Christmas has not yet announced their results so I'm still enjoying the sweet sense of possibility.

Oh, and I've found the perfect source for some research I need on a current WIP and he said he'll be happy to help me.

Okay, it doesn't rate up there with signing a three book deal, or finding an agent who adores my book but for today...it's enough.

How about you?  Anything in your life giving you a boost today?

 Thought for the Day:

I don't want to brag or make anyone jealous or anything, but I can still fit into the earrings I wore in high school.

*grin*

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

A Silly Picture Hump Day

Happy Hump Day

Hi.  Ready for some Hump Day funnies?  
Well, here they are.



 Sophie does the same thing.  You should see me trying to text with her sitting on my phone.




 He'd drop them now but he's stuck.



 I love this.



Hey, don't laugh. It's a serious question.

 


Well, this is just all about Hump Day.


And I wouldn't forget your weekly "aw".

I'll bet even the guys said it on this one.


Okay, there you go. Hope that did the trick and got you over the mid-week hump. Did you have a favorite?


Groaner of the Day:   I tried to catch some fog.  I mist.

A Spunky New Book - L. Diane Wolfe's Latest Release


Wait a minute.  This isn't Monday.

Yup, I'm adjusting my regular M-W-F posting schedule this week because I want to help a Spunky friend celebrate the release--today!--of her new book.






HOW TO PUBLISH AND PROMOTE YOUR BOOK NOW!
By L. Diane Wolfe


Publishing and promoting made simple!


Have you always dreamed of publishing a book but didn’t know where to begin? This book walks you through the steps of identifying markets, budgeting, building an online presence, and generating publicity. Get the whole story on:

Traditional publishing
Self publishing
Print and e-book setup, formatting, and distribution
Finding your target audience
Generating reviews and media interest
Networking and developing an online presence
Promotional materials and appearances

Uncover your ideal publishing path and numerous marketing options before you begin. Writing is your dream. Give it the best chance for success!


Interested? Well, if you're a writer, of course you are.  So here are those important links:

About the author - Known as “Spunk On A Stick,” Wolfe is a member of the National Speakers Association and a motivational speaker. She’s conducted seminars on book publishing and promoting for five years and assisted writers through several author services. Her other titles include “Overcoming Obstacles With SPUNK!” which ties her goal-setting and leadership seminar’s information together, and a YA series, “The Circle of Friends.” Wolfe travels extensively for media interviews and speaking engagements, maintains a dozen websites & blogs, and contributes to several other sites and newsletters. 
 
You can find her at - 
Blog - Spunk On A Stick’s Tips - http://circleoffriendsbooks.blogspot.com/
Webpage - Spunk On A Stick - http://www.spunkonastick.net/


 
Best of luck on your release, Diane.  

And let's see lots of nice comments today to get things rolling.

I'll be back on schedule tomorrow with your Hump Day funnies.

Joke of the Day:

I was visiting my son last night and I asked if I could borrow a newspaper.

"This is the 21st century, Dad," he said.  "We don't waste money on newspapers.
Here, you can borrow my iPad."

I can tell you, that fly never knew what hit him.

Friday, February 1, 2013

Hey, I Received an Award.

Look what I've got.




My thanks to blog buddy Eve at Little Things for sharing this lovely award. If you don't follow Eve's blog, by all means, hop on over and check it out.  It's a fun blog with some very cool video clips.

Eve did explain that this award comes with the following rules:

 1. Display the 'Versatile Blogger Award' badge on your site.
  2. Announce your win with a post and a link to whomever presented you with the award.
  3. Present 15 awards to deserving bloggers.
4. Drop them a comment to let them know that you've presented them
with this very prestigious award.
     5. Post seven interesting things about yourself.


Okay, I've obviously got numbers 1 and 2 covered. But here's where I run into trouble. A good number of my blogging buddies have told me they would rather not receive blog awards.  Many have their posts planned and/or written well in advance and this leaves them with the choice of altering their plan or being rude and ignoring the award.  Of course, others - like me - think they're fun and enjoy getting them. Unfortunately, since I have the most awful memory, I'm never sure who does and who doesn't. 

So here's is my solution. If you visit this post and leave a comment (just a "hi" will do) then I present you with this award. Please accept it or not with my best wishes.

Well, that takes care of number 4, as well. (If you pick up your award from here, you certainly know about it.) So let's move on to number 5. Hmm.  Seven interesting things. Okay, here goes.


1. I was born on my dad's birthday.  He says I was the most expensive gift he ever received. 




2. Last summer I was part of a team of volunteers who rebuilt a couple's home that was severely damaged by a tornado. We had them home in time for Thanksgiving.



3. I have the world's most neurotic dog. She's a Jack Russell terrier we adopted from the county shelter last year. Although she's very affectionate and sweet natured, Sophie is afraid of light, dark, noise, sudden movement, coming in the front door, walking into the kitchen, her water dish, the toaster when it pops, sneezes (including her own), other dogs, cats, ...oh wait, how long is this post?



4. When I was a kid, I was convinced I was faster on the draw than my brother.  Until the picture proved me wrong.  (But I was still pretty fast.)


5. I once appeared in the same dance recital as my daughter-in-law, and two of my grandchildren.  In fact, that's the only time I ever appeared in a dance recital.



6. One skill I have never mastered is pinning on corsages.






7. I believe this is one of the most beautiful places in the world.  Fenway Park in Boston.  Go Red Sox!.




That's my seven. Hope they counted as interesting. Thanks again Eve.


The Versitile Blogger award wasn't the only thing I won this week. At the Indies 4 Hire Facebook Event I was the lucky winner of a "50 page edit or a novel formatted". There were lots of great discussions at this event and they're still available to read.  If you missed it, I highly recommend you go over and check it out. 

Thanks again, Gwen Gardner and Maria Zannini.


The other thing I won this week wasn't quite so lucky.  I won my bet with my doctor. The MRI that I mentioned on Wednesday confirmed a torn medial meniscus in my knee. Now I get to meet with an orthopedist to find out my options. Thanks to all who asked about it.


So, that wraps up the week. Got anything good planned for the weekend?

Thought for the Day: 

Always be yourself because the people that matter don't mind, and the ones who mind don't matter.