Assorted Hump Day Funnies Just for You

Happy Hump Day

How did you ever get over the mid-week hump the last couple weeks without me?

Well, wait no more - I've got an assortment of funnies for you this morning.

First, a photo to make you go, "Huh?"  Check out the product label.

 Think someone should tell them?

Here's a joke in honor of my husband...who could definitely be this guy.

A man and his wife walk into a dentist's office.    

The man says to the dentist, "Doc, I'm in one heck of a hurry.  I have two buddies sitting out in my car waiting for us to go play golf, so forget about the anesthetic. I don't have time for the gums to get numb. I just want you to pull the tooth, and be done with it!”

 “But, sir…” the dentist began.
          
“No buts. We have a 10:00AM tee time at the best golf course in town and it's 9:30 already. I don't have time to wait for anesthetic!”'

The dentist is a little taken aback at pulling the tooth without using anything to kill the pain but he yields to the man’s wishes.  "All right, sir.  Which tooth is it?"
 

The man turns to his wife and says, "Open your mouth, honey, and show him."  

 Well, maybe not. But I make a point of driving myself to the dentist.

 How about another head-scratcher?

 

 Um, which way should I go?

This next joke's in honor of my old home town of Boston. (Go Red Sox!)

  

Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu.

The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.

However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.

MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger.

The conclusion was that while all the lookout crows could say "Cah", but  none could say "Truck."

 My friends from the south may not get that one.

 This picture could almost qualify as a Groaner.

And, of course, I didn't forget your "aw".

 Does this little guy make you say it? 

He definitely got me.

Okay, did those do it for you? Over the hump and on the easy slope to the weekend?

Perfect.

Did you have a favorite?

Definition of the Day:

TYPE-BLINDNESS: The inability to recognize a typo in your e-mail until you’ve pushed the "Send" button.