Wednesday, February 25, 2015

A Little Mental Exercise for Hump Day

Happy Hump Day

I  hope you're all making it through the week and staying warm. 

Maybe a little exercise will help.

Oh, don't panic, I'm talking about mental exercise. 

Spread through this post will be four questions. Try to come up with the answer before moving on.

Here's the first one:

How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

While you think about that one, here's a local weather report...

Did you decide on your answer?  Here's what is should have been:

Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 

Let's try the next one:

How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? 

While you're pondering that one, here's a joke.

A lady on a city bus, who happened to be very pregnant, noticed the young man opposite her was starting at her and smiling. His attention made her uncomfortable so she moved to another seat.This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing.  She complained to the driver and he had the man arrested.
The case came up in court and the judge asked the man what he had to say for himself.
The man replied, "Well your Honor, it was like this...When the lady got on the bus, I couldn't help but notice her condition.She sat down under a sign that said, 'The Double Mint Twins are coming.' and I had to smile. Then she moved and sat under a sign that said, 'Logan's Liniment will reduce the swelling.' and it made me grin. Then she placed herself under a deodorant sign that said,'William's Big Stick Did the Trick,' and I could hardly contain myself. But, Your Honor, when she moved the fourth time and sat under a sign that said, 'Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this accident!'... I just lost it."
The case was dismissed. 
Okay, got your answer ready?

Did you say: Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator?
Nope, wrong answer.

The correct answer was:

Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door.

How are you doing? Let's try this one.

The Lion King is hosting an Animal Conference. All the animals attend ... except one. Which animal does not attend?

While you work on that one, check this guy out.
I have absolutely no idea what to say.

Got your answer?

It should be...

The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there.

Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your true abilities. Here's the final question.

There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?

But before the's your weekly "aw".

In keeping with our weather woes...

Have you got an "aw" for this little guy?

 Mom, it's cold out here.
 Okay, final answer. How do you cross that river?
You jump into the river and swim across. Haven’t you been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Conference.'d you do? Get 'em all right? Just a couple? Not even one?

That's okay. At least you're over the hump and on your way to the weekend.

Hope it's a great one.

See you next Wednesday.
Quote for Today: 
As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind - every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder.  ~ John Glenn



Scribbles From Jenn said...

It's easy for me to stay warm, I'm in L.A., where, at times, it's too warm (sorry). Love the two feet of snow and the John Glenn quote.

Rhonda Albom said...

Fun. This post was just fun. That last photo, at first I couldn't figure it out, then I burst into laughter. What a dummy.

Julie Flanders said...

LOL I didn't get that photo at first either but then I cracked up like Rhonda. Love the little cutie in his sweater. Aww!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I actually got the refrigerator ones!
The snow pup is cute.

mshatch said...

I got no. 3 right cuz I remembered the elephant was stuck in the fridge :)

Susan Gourley/Kelley said...

Funny quote by John Glenn and all the more for being true. Chainsaw guy needs some help.

Crystal Collier said...

LOL! You totally got me with the questions, and that chainsaw picture... Whew! My diaphragm got a workout with that one.

Donna K. Weaver said...

Brain teasers? LOL that implies I have one.

Sherry Ellis said...

Those were so funny! What was that guy thinking with the chainsaw?

LD Masterson said...

Jenn - yeah, but can you make a snowman in your front yard?

Ronda - The first time I saw that picture, I didn't realize where he was holding that chainsaw, then my jaw dropped. A guy is usually more protective of certain parts of his anatomy.

Julie - Yup, you had to give that little guy an aw.

Alex - I'd expect no less from a ninja.

LD Masterson said...

mshatch - Did you remember to let him out of the fridge when you were done?

Susan G/K - Sadly, that's also how we equip our military.

Crystal - Cool. So I did give you some exercise.

Donna - Far be it from me to make implications.

Sherry - He reminds me of the idiot whose gum misfires so he looks down the barrel and tries again.

Maryann Miller said...

I was shocked when I saw the chainsaw picture. What a doofus. Loved the ongoing joke. I got three of the questions right. And of course, the "aw" picture made me smile. Sharing your blog all over the place. (smile)

Maryann Miller said...

Loved the John Glenn quote, too. Forgot to mention that.

DL Hammons said...

My jaw dropped when I saw the chainsaw picture. :)

Carol Kilgore said...

Fun post! Happy Hump Day!

Kaye George said...

I got a perfect score on the quiz. Missed every one! It's late, OK? And it's snowing AGAIN here and everything will be closed again. It wears a person down. Thanks for the laughs!

Arlee Bird said...

I felt like a kid again with the refrigerator jokes--I'm terrible at things like that.

The pregnant woman joke is hilarious.

Arlee Bird
A to Z Challenge Co-host
Tossing It Out

LD Masterson said...

Maryann - Three question right? Yay! And thanks so much for sharing me.

DL - That's not all that's gonna drop if he suddenly gets that thing working.

Carol - Thanks. Have a great week.

Kaye - I hear you about the snow. Here, too. Try to keep laughing.

Lee - Thanks for liking the pregnant woman joke. No one else mentioned it so I was afraid I'd picked a dud.

Empty Nest Insider said...

I also thought the joke about the pregnant woman was funny! Are you sure you didn't perform your act in the Catskills? You have an excellent timing/pacing rhythm with your material. Now this is my kind of exercise!


Maria Zannini said...

Re: chainsaw guy
And THIS is why we should let nature take its course and allow only the smart ones to make it.


LD Masterson said...

Julie - I have been told to take my act on the road...and keep going.

Maria - So true.

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi LD - I'm hopeless at these .. so obvious and such fun - but I blew them away. Crazy .. poor giraffe I was going to cut him up, I could use that chain saw I guess, but you released him ... poor elebum - perhaps he could breathe through his trunk somehow ...

Crazy - but brilliant ... and John Glenn's quote - trouble is it's always true ... luck must feature highly in many of our lives .. cheers Hilary

Mike Keyton said...

The Assyrian eunuch had only his testicles removed. The Chines eunach had everything removed. That guy is going a stage further :)

Did John Glenn, really say that? Brilliant.

Lexa Cain said...

OMG - I totally cracked up at the ongoing giraffe/elephant/crocodiles jokes! So clever of you to insert things in between them so we'd have to wait for the punch lines. And what the heck is that guy doing with the CHAINSAW??!! :O said...

You rascal! I didn't get any of those riddles right.

Have a great weekend, LD.

LD Masterson said...

Hilary - YOU WERE GOING TO SAW UP MY GIRAFFE?!? I hate to think what you'd do to that little puppy. LOL!

Mike - Oh yeah, he was risking it ALL.

Lexa - Well, I have to space them out or you'd see the answer too fast. Gotta make you work for it a little.

LD Masterson said...

Hey, Robyn, how did you sneak in there? Don't worry about the quiz. You'll get 'em next time. :-)

Kristin Smith said...

Hahahahaha!!! I'm still laughing at the pregnant woman joke. That's the funniest one I've heard in quite some time. Thanks for the laugh!

And that puppy is too cute. I'd love to bring him home to my house! My boys would have fun with him!

Liz Fichera said...

That guy with the chainsaw??? O.M.G.

M. K. Theodoratus said...

As usual, I'm late to the party. Still, thanks for the laughs. That chainsaw bit needs to be in a "redneck collection".

LD Masterson said...

Kristin - Hey, I'm glad you liked it.

Liz - Amen.

M.K. - Always glad to see you, no matter when.