Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Tornadoes in Ohio and Furniture Woes - Part Two

Happy Hump Day.

Okay, I'll admit it right up front. I'm cheating a little on your hump day funnies this week. I'm running behind on my editing and since you all seemed to really like last week's post, I'm going to give you Furniture Pet Woes - Part Two. Plus a joke or two, of course.

Before we start, I had an interesting experience this past weekend I'd like to share (part of the reason I'm behind on other things). Last week, a tornado touched down not too far from here. No causalities but it destroyed one home and did major damage to a number of others. I went out with our church disaster response team to help. The lady we were helping had quite a bit of damage to her house, which luckily insurance would take care off, but she was very concerned about her barn. This barn was built in the late 1800s and a more modern structure would probably have been flattened. As it was, the storm pealed back the metal roof like a can opener and knocked a big hole in the framework. Her immediate need was getting all the wet hay out of the wooden lofts before rot could set in. So she handed us some pitchforks and we got to work. It was the first time I'd ever used a pitchfork. I think I have a knack for it.

One crew tossed the hay from the lofts to the floor then another one moved it outside. I was in the second team. It went well until one of the upstairs crew decided to use a shovel to scrape up what was left and push it over the side - directly above where I was working. I don't want to tell you what he dumped on my head but the shower I took that night was very hot and very long. (Go ahead and laugh. My grandkids thought it was hysterical.)

We also spent some time walking the farm fields, gathering large pieces of debris - mostly tree limbs and pieces of metal siding. Biggest thing we found...a telephone pole, sheared off at its base and still trailing its wires, sitting in the middle of a bean field. We never did figure out where it had blown in from. I wish I'd gotten a picture of it for you.

Okay, let move on to your hump day funnies.

One thing we didn't cover last week was the age old problem of sectionals.

And then there are slippery chairs a poor kitty can slide right off of.

That 'slide right off of' problem seems to happen with couch cushions, too.

Why, a poor pet could disappear and be trapped forever.

It's just too horrifying to think about.

Let's switch to a joke. 

I'm picking on little old ladies again. 
(Did I tell you I just turned 65?)
With all the new technology regarding fertility recently, a 65-year-old friend of mine was able to give birth. When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, I went to visit. 

'May I see the new baby?' I asked. 

 'Not yet,' she said. 'I'll make coffee and we can talk for a while first.' 

 Thirty minutes passed and I asked, 'May I see the new baby now?' 

 'No, not yet,' she said. 

A little while later, I asked again, 'May I see the baby now?' 

'No, not yet,' replied my friend. 

 Growing impatient, I asked, 'Well, when can I see the baby?' 

 'When he cries.' she told me. 

'When he cries? Why do I have to wait until he CRIES?' 


 Oh, come on. That was funny.

Time for your "aw".

I almost didn't use this one because it was a little blatant in the "aw" department.
But it was just too cute to pass up.

Don't you think?

Did we get there? Over the hump and coasting toward the weekend?
 I hope so.

Did you have a favorite?

Have a fantastic weekend - Memorial Day Weekend for my friends here in the States.

See you next week.

Quote for Memorial Day:

"The price of freedom is eternal vigilance."  President Thomas Jefferson



Carol Kilgore said...

I love that joke! You do good work helping others. And that's no joke :)

Susan Gourley/Kelley said...

Those winds do amazing and often terrible things. Have a great weekend.

Crystal Collier said...

LOL! Oh those poor trapped animals...

That's crazy about the tornado. I'm glad no one was hurt, but a telephone pole? Seriously?

mshatch said...

Love the joke, but seriously, who wants a kid when they're 65? Not to mention I can totally see that happening!

The kitten sliding off the chair made me laugh, too :)

Maryann Miller said...

OMG, I loved the 65 year old mother joke. And the "aw" picture was precious. Thanks for the fun.

Gina Gao said...

The little cat picture is so adorable!!

farawayeyes said...

OK, I admit it, even though I'm
Nit a 'cat person' that aww picture got me.

I used to live in the Midwest were tornados we're prevalent. They scare the carp outta me.

That joke would totally be me, and I wouldn't have to be 65 for that to happen. HA!

Jemi Fraser said...

Blatant or not, that's a great Awww!
Good for you for helping out - wish Ma Nature was kinder though!

LD Masterson said...

Carol - Aw, thank you.

Susan G/K - The forces of nature are awesome.

Crystal - Yup. Seriously.

mshatch - Not me. I can barely keep up with the grandkids.

Maryann - Glad you enjoyed.

Gina - Admit it. You said "aw".

farawayeyes - We just finished (about 10 minutes ago) with another round of thunderstorms with high winds and hail. At least no funnel clouds this time.

Jemi - She is. She gives us a lot of beautiful days. But when she's in a bad mood...

Lexa Cain said...

It's wonderful how your community came to the aid of people who needed it, and I'm sure all the ickies are washed out of your hair now.

I have a sectional, and I swear there are times I look like that dog - only more like a hippo. Yes, hippos can fall between cushions too.

The joke was HILARIOUS!!! And I adored the "Aww." Have an awesome week! :)

Mike Keyton said...

Your story about what was dumped on your head was a killer, but I'm afraid it was trumped by that picture of the cat's paw waving feebly from the quicksand of the couch. That image will stay, I'm afraid : )

Mason Canyon said...

So glad no one was killed in the tornado. Terrible weather we're having. I always get a laugh out of your pet photos. The last one is a adorable. Have a great Memorial holiday.

Murees Dupé said...

Tornado's are scary. But luckily you could all work together to help each other. All these photos made me laugh, thank you. Have a great weekend.

Robin said...

Sorry I am late.

Wow. That tornado really did a number on everything. I can't imagine a telephone pole uprooted and flown around. As you say, that barn is likely only still standing because it was so solid. I bet it was very satisfying helping in that situation. At least it was until they dumped poo on your head. Yikes.

I loved the Aw picture.

Emily R. King said...

Wow about the tornado. It's amazing the barn is still standing!

Patricia Stoltey said...

Wow, seeing that barn roof peeled back like that is a pretty clear statement about the power of the storm. I would have been pretty scared.

The pet pictures are too funny. I like the one of the kitty paws sticking up from the cushions.

And the joke is definitely funny. I have to write everything down or it's gone and may or may not come back in a day or ten.

Cathy Kennedy said...

Tornadoes aren't a laughing matter, but you did make me smile really big with what happened to you in the barn. Thanks!

Julie Luek said...

I love when neighbors pull together like this and help each other out-- this is exactly as it should be, in my book. Reminds me of the barn building in the movie Witness. Lovely.

Jan Newman said...

The kitty paws! Poor pets. Who knew furniture could be so dangerous? And the Aw was worth it. Glad you took a chance on it. ;)

Arlee Bird said...

Okay the old lady joke was laugh out loud funny. Loved it!

Somehow that wrinkly dog and that wrinkly couch really go together well.

Tossing It Out

Morgan said...

Oh my gosh… that trapped kitty picture is KILLING me… why do I find it so funny?!?!?!

I LOVE THESE POSTS. :) said...

Oh the rewards of volunteer efforts - getting dumped on. I'm sorry. I hope some day you'll laugh about it too. You are a very good soul, LD.

Heather Holden said...

Oh, yikes! Sorry about that stuff that got dumped on your head... D:

Those animals are hilarious, though! The last "trapped pet" pic especially cracked me up...

Tyrean Martinson said...

You do wonderful work for others! Thank you for sharing what you do - even the less fun, but funny parts. It's an inspiration, and it's what I really liked best about this post!

Marcia said...

That did make me laugh!

LD Masterson said...

Lexa - Oh, I just shaved my head. (Kidding.) And that's why I don't have a sectional.

Mike - Yup, that one did me in.

Mason - I'm glad you liked them. And thanks.

Murees - You, too.

Robin - I never even mentioned the lady's mare who was picked up and dumped two fields away. The mare was injured but is expecting to recover.

Emily - So true.

Patricia - I think the kitty paws are today's winner.

Cathy - Yeah, I figured that would give people a laugh. I'm just glad no one got a picture.

Julie - That's why I like being part of the disaster team.

Jan - Me, too. It deserved a chance.

Lee - Hey, you never use the words "old lady" and "wrinkly" that close together.

Morgan - Hey, THANKS!

Robyn - Oh, I was able to laugh as soon as I'd had my shower. Before then, not so much.

Heather - Yeah, that one is getting all the laughs. And it's only a pair of paws.

Tyrean - Thank you. Honestly, I get more than I give (and I don't mean on my head).

Marcia - Good. That's the plan.

Nicki Elson said...

You have a great weekend too!

Oy, my mind is already so forgetful, I can only imagine where it'll be when I'm 65 -- there are definitely reasons God set up the equipment to shut OFF at a certain stage in life, hehe.

That's so wonderful you all went out to help that woman. I'm guessing you'll volunteer for upper-level duty next time, eh?

Al Diaz said...

It's great that people help each other in times of trouble, of course without dumping anything on each other's head. ;)
The joke was very good. I laughed! Dragon Hugs!

L. Diane Wolfe said...

Hope that barn can be saved.
I love the cat sliding off the back of the chair.

LD Masterson said...

Nikki - Or at least I won't stand too close to one of the upper ledges.

AL - Hugs back.

Diane - There's a restoration crew already working on the barn. It should be okay.

Anonymous said...

Cute kitten.

I don't have sectionals, so I don't see this.

Tornadoes are scary. I hope we don't have too many this season.

LD Masterson said...

Medeia - I agree. No more at all would suit me.

Liz Fichera said...

So sorry to hear about the tornadoes...they are scary. I clearly remember them from living in Illinois.

How kind of you to help your neighbors. That warms my heart.

LD Masterson said...

Liz - I'm sure you had your share of tornado scares in Illinois. Joys of summer in the midwest.