Are You Still Out There?

HAPPY HUMP DAY

I obviously wandered away from the blogosphere this past year so I have no idea if anyone will notice this post but I want to say hi. I've been off trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. I won't bore you with the details. At least, not in this post.  Let's do some random thoughts instead.

On writing - Here's something I didn't know, that I thought was interesting.  I recently had a previously published short story picked up for a re-print in another anthology.  Since the story had already been published, I wasn't expecting a lot of edits in the copy proof. Surprise! The editor of the new anthology made bunches of changes, mostly in punctuation. I went back and looked at the copy proofs from the original publication and many of the new changes reversed punctuation changes from the original edit which, in turn, were changes from how I wrote it.  I guess it all depends on which set of rules you follow. Sure seems to be a lot of them.

On family - We had a happening last week. (Yes, that's our Marine and he's holding a ring box.)

She said yes.

On Hump Day - Well, of course I have a hump day funny for you.

A guy was getting ready to tee off on the first hole when a second golfer approached and asked if he could join him. The first said that he usually played alone, but agreed to the twosome.

They were even after the first few holes. The second guy said, "We're about evenly matched, how about playing for five bucks a hole?" The first guy said that he wasn't much for betting, but agreed to the terms.

The second guy won the remaining sixteen holes with ease.

As they were walking off number eighteen, the second guy was busy counting his $80.00. He confessed that he was the pro at a neighboring course and liked to pick on suckers. The first fellow revealed that he was the Parish Priest. The pro was flustered and apologetic, offering to return the money. The Priest said, "You won fair and square and I was foolish to bet with you. You keep your winnings."

The pro said, "Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?"

The Priest said, "Well, you could come to Mass on Sunday and make a donation...... And, if you want to bring your mother and father along, I'll marry them."

Oh, that's so bad.

For me, that "on bended knee" picture above qualifies as an "aw", but in case it didn't do it for you...

I know those eyes got you.

Okay, that's all for now. I'm going to make the rounds and try to visit everyone this week. I hope no one moved.  If you stop by, please say hi. I've missed you.


Thought for the Day:

Your future self is watching you right now through memories.  

Hump Day Groans and Giggles

Happy Hump Day

Hey, I'm doing better this week. I actually got my Hump Day post up before noon. Maybe there's hope for me getting back on schedule.  But I know you're waiting for your hump day funnies, so let's get right to it...

This just made me laugh.

Ready for a joke?

There was a house painter named Smokey MacGregor who was very interested in making a penny where he could, so he often thinned down his paint to make it go a wee bit further.

One summer the local church decided to do a big restoration job on the outside of one of their biggest buildings. Smokey put in a bid and, because his price was so low, he got the job.

He set about erecting the scaffolding and setting up the planks, buying the paint and yes, I am sorry to say, thinning it down with turpentine.

Well, Smokey was up on the scaffolding, painting away, the job nearly completed, when suddenly there was a horrendous clap of thunder, the sky opened and the rain poured down washing the thinned paint
from all over the church and knocking Smokey clear off the scaffold to land on the lawn among the gravestones, surrounded by telltale puddles of the thinned and useless paint.

Smokey was no fool. He knew this was a judgment from the Almighty, so he got down on his knees and cried:

"Oh God, Oh God, forgive me; what should I do?"

And from the thunder, a mighty voice spoke.
.
.
.
(you're going to love this)
.
.
.
"Repaint! Repaint! And thin no more!"

Be honest now...did you see it coming?

Should I be repenting for telling that joke?

 

Here's something I can relate to.



Yup, there went that New Year's resolution.


This one didn't really get me until I looked at the cat's eyes.


 

Zombie kitties!!!!

 

 

How about a couple questions to ponder?

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he naked or homeless?

Can you cry under water?

The "aw" in this picture may not jump right out at you but look at that dog's face.

 

 Can't you just hear the sigh of contentment?

 

 

Okay, are we there yet?  Over the hump? Coasting to the weekend?

 

Good, 'cause I'm out of groaners funnies for today.

 

Since we have five Wednesdays this month, I think I'll do something different for my post next week. I'm not sure what but I hope you'll come by and check it out.  Have a wonderful week.

 

Quote for today:

 

Many people hear voices when no one is there. Some of them are called mad and are shut up in rooms where they stare at the walls all day. Others are called writers and they do pretty much the same thing.  - Meg Chittenden